Monday, July 4, 2011

Happy Independence Day

July 4th is off to a rousing start here in our household!


We yawned, stretched and managed to crawl out of bed at…gulp, dare I say?…11:00 a.m. I guess that’s what we get for staying up until 2:00 in the morning, watching “Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban!”

But I guess in a way that’s what freedom is all about, isn’t it? The ability to do pretty much anything you want, almost anywhere, anytime. Even if that something is nothing.

The cat was pacing maniacally when I got downstairs, meowing and flicking his tail to show his displeasure. The pugs, who were spinning, barking and making weird chirping noises -- even more than usual -- made me feel like a complete and total heel. Though, in their defense, 11:00 is rather late for them to get fed. They normally eat around 7:30.

So, after quickly getting over my guilt, my partner and I had French Toast, cleaned the house up a little and now, here I sit with coffee in hand, working on this blog post and answering e-mail I hadn’t checked in a couple of days.

One of them concerns freelance work, which has stepped up quite a bit over the past few weeks. Personally, I’m hoping it continues because maybe that way I’ll be able to quit the p/t job I have that I really don’t enjoy. We’ll see.

Meanwhile, in replying to the folks I freelance for, I stepped back mentally and thought what a cool thing it is that I do. Aside from the writing, this is the very first “job” I’ve ever had that’s satisfying. And what a weird way to earn a living! Most times all I do is…well, I guess you can call it data management. Basically -- for those of you who have asked what I do -- after getting a list of scenes and sites that need to be updated, I make sure that the raw content provided by producers of adult gay entertainment is transferred from where it resides, to where it needs to go. That way, members…or would they be subscribers?…can look at pretty pictures of naked men, view trailers and decide whether or not they want to peruse the entire scene online or download it.

I do other things as well. Sometimes they have me write copy, scene descriptions and, on occasion, make up stuff about the models. I guess they like what I’m doing because they’ve not only increased my hourly rate without me asking, they’ve sent buttloads of new scenes for one of three sites they’ll be launching this year. This means I get to look at a lot of material consisting of pretty things kissing, frolicking, and cavorting. Oh, and penis. Loads and loads of penis. In fact, when you combine all the scenes, there are literally thousands of them! And I get to look through each one to delete, touch-up, re-size and sometimes re-crop the penii that will appear online.

I wonder, though. With so much penis, would it be penii or a school of penis? A herd of penis? Or maybe it's a flock of penis? Nah, can’t be. Sounds too much like a musical group.

Sometimes, when my partner comes home from work -- after a day of wrestling with big, wet dogs, nasty cats and having to put up with whiny pet owners who can often be worse than parents of human children -- I’m all bleary-eyed and drained. Yes, looking at penis all day can be exhausting! Seriously, it’s true! There are times where I feel that if look at one more penis, I swear I’ll poke my eyes out. But then I have a glass of wine and I forget all about them.

I still feel guilty about it, though. Not because of the work I’m doing but, because I’m actually having fun. It’s a unique job and, in a way, I have to be grateful to the Universe for having thrown this my way when I needed it most.

In a way, I can’t help thinking that if it weren’t for our forefathers, perhaps I might not even be here to write this today, let alone do the kind of work I've been doing. Who knows where we would be, or what sort of country this would be like. Yes, it might be better, but it could also be a lot worse.

So, in honor of Independence Day, I’d like to say thank you to our forefathers for putting their foot down and fighting for what they believed in. I’d like to thank our country’s veterans, who have fought and died so we can do pretty much anything we want; even if it’s sleeping in late. I’d also like to thank the brave men and women who are still abroad, doing something I could never do. May you all come home soon. Safely.

But above all else, Happy Independence Day to you all; especially those of you fighting against the chains of addiction, fear, and hopelessness. Sometimes, the largest battles we fight are the ones raging within ourselves.


  1. It is good to remind ourselves that we are free to do what we wish because someone fought for it. I'm thankful every day for what I have and the people in my life.
    Sounds like you have an interesting job! And I admit sometimes I get tired of writing and creating a false happy ending - LOL So I remind myself to go out and find it for myself!

  2. I know what you mean about that happy ending Kellie. There are so many times I'll read something or watch a movie and think to myself that it's just not possible, given the circumstances. And yet, I often yearn and crave for that happy ending more than anything. I hope we both find our happiness in all life has to offer.